As mentioned a few days ago, I attended a Halloween party in The Kentlands this year as a zombie. It was my homage to the Frederick Jaycees’ Haunted Hayride.
One of the fun things to do after working at the hayride was once things were over for the evening, a group would usually go out for dinner, still in makeup. When a group of a dozen more zombies walks into a restaurant, it never fails to get the attention of the other diners and frequently led to opportunities to promote the Haunted Hayride or (better yet) the Jaycees.
I had no sooner mentioned this then Julie spoke the fateful words, “I dare you to go over to Whole Foods dressed like that.”
Get into mischief? Me? 🙂
Well there was no point in a zombie going shopping without an audience. You have to a few people going along to witness the silliness and (of course) take a few photos. So after seeking out a few people dressed in what passed for everyday street clothes, Julie, Melissa, Stephanie and I set out for our little adventure.
I don’t know how she managed to capture a photo of them (I didn’t even see them myself) but during the walk to the store, Stephanie managed to capture an image of what I can only describe as ghosts.
The person working at the meat counter left right before I got there, so I couldn’t ask him about any fresh brains. But don’t you think that stuff behind the glass looks rather cerebral?
There was someone working at the fish counter though. She took it completely in stride when I asked, “Do you have any fresh brains?”
“No.” she replied with a laugh, “Maybe next week.”
“Damn, just my rotten luck.” (On the other hand, can you imagine if she’d said yes??!!)
Most of the other shoppers in the store seemed to be oblivious to the dead guy walking the aisles with them. It makes me wonder, at 8:30 pm on a Saturday, is it possible that the other shoppers were the real zombies?
When I walked into the produce department, one of the stockers was unloading a box of some sort of melons. At first I didn’t think he saw me looking over the papayas on the other side of the display, then the woman at the fish counter got his attention and trying not to laugh he called back to her, “Yeah, I see him.”
With not quite a week to go until Halloween, of course there was an endcap full of Halloween candy. What a perfect place for a zombie to stop and try to blend in!
And over in the chips aisle, there was another ghost!
The few shoppers who did notice me in the store tended to look at me very strangely. (I don’t understand why.) It wasn’t until arriving at the checkout that any of the other shoppers was willing to make eye contact. Along with the cashier and the bagger, she was clearly entertained. But again, most of the shoppers zombies in the other checkout lanes were oblivious. (It somewhat reminded me of a scene from Dawn of the Dead with the zombies returning to the mall, unaware of their own demise.)
Many thanks to:
Julie: For suggesting this escapade.
Stephanie: For taking on the role of photographer.
Melissa: For a complete lack of adult supervision.
I wonder what sort of mischief I can get into next year?
Category Archives: Mischief
Halloween Costume
A few days ago, I promised a photo of my costume from last weekend’s Halloween party.
This get up is, of course, very similar to how I was made up last year when I was chasing people through the cornfields, and that was quite deliberate. The Frederick Jaycees didn’t run their Haunted Hayride project this year, so this was my “Tribute Costume.” (You can’t tell from this photo, but the shirt is a Haunted Hayride “Event Staff” shirt from the 2006 season.)
There is also a series of photos from an adventure I went on during the party, but those will have to wait until at least this evening.
Temptation
Halloween is next Friday. It’s one of my favorite holidays.
Target is selling an adult-sized gorilla costume for $69.95.
I only have to be strong for a few more days. Then they’ll (hopefully) be out of stock.
Revealing Luke's Secret Plan
A while back, I noticed that one of the posts on Luke’s “Toothface” blog starts off with the sentence, “I was introduced to Keith Olbermann from my BSG Seminary Collegue this past winter.” I’ve been intrigued by that statement ever since.
I’m by no means well-versed in the names of the various seminaries in existence, but a reference to a “BSG Seminary” definitely catches my eye. Particularly when it comes from Luke, because the two of us share an appreciation for the TV show Battlestar Galactica or, as it’s known in some circles, “BSG.”
I don’t recall anyone on the show ever mentioning a seminary, but the show has embraced religious themes from the first episode, so it’s not much of a stretch for there to have been a seminary somewhere along the line.
There’s also an interesting distinction to be made: Luke subscribes to a monotheistic belief system. The human survivors of the twelve colonies, for the most part, follow a polytheistic religion (it’s not entirely clear whether the colonials worship the Greek/Roman gods).
There are exceptions of course. Along with a few atheists, there are a few who believe in only one god. I believe Kara Thrace (“Starbuck”) is an example of the latter group.
Of course, there’s another group in Battlestar Galactica who worship only one god: The Cylons. And the Cylons also have religous leaders, such as Brother Cavil.
The Cylons were created by Man
They Rebelled
They Evolved
There are Many Copies
And They Have a Plan
I’m onto your plan Luke!!!
Be Like Julie
Like Dustin Hoffman says, “You gotta be like Julie.”
It’s a funny video, and of course (like you’d expect this time of year) it’s one with a message.
REQUEST FOR URGENT CONFIDENTIAL BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP
As John points out, this is a chain post. (John blames Wil Wheaton, so I’ll happily blame John.) I’m fairly comfortable stating that this post doesn’t invoke The Curse since (a) you chose to visit my site instead of me dumping this in your in box and (b) this doesn’t end with the usual litany of bad outcomes if you don’t pass it along.
And hey, maybe this one will really work!
REQUEST FOR URGENT CONFIDENTIAL BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP
From: Minister of the Treasury Paulson
Subject: REQUEST FOR URGENT CONFIDENTIAL BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP
Dear American:
I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude.
I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 800 billion dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you.
I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a Senator, you may know him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s. This transactin is 100% safe.
This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check. We need the funds as quickly as possible. We cannot directly transfer these funds in the names of our close friends because we are constantly under surveillance. My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred.
Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchildren to wallstreetbailout@treasury.gov so that we may transfer your commission for this transaction. After I receive that information, I will respond with detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds.
Yours Faithfully
Minister of Treasury Paulson
Avast Ye Swabs!
Arrrr! Just so ye won’t be complain’ that nobody reminded ye, Friday be Talk Like a Pirate Day!
I’ve assembled a bounty of piratical resources to help ye prepare for this event, so let’s just dive right in, shall we? What be yer pirate name?
My pirate name is:
Mad Jack Kidd
Every pirate is a little bit crazy. You, though, are more than just a little bit. Even though you’re not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!
Nineteen Days and Countin'!
As ye are knowin’, the Nineteenth of September be Talk Like a Pirate Day. How do ye plan on celebratin’ this most auspicious holiday?
(I be puttin’ up a page soon with links to helpful piratical resources.)
(Helpful piratical resources)
Asking for Trouble
The Mad Russian is going to be out of the office for the next two weeks. One week in training, one week on vacation. She won’t be in the office at all during that time, so she’s asked me to water her plants while she’s away.
On the one hand, they’re just a couple plants. But the truth is, people care a great deal about their office plants. You don’t ask someone to take care of your plants if you don’t trust them. It’s a responsibility I’m taking quite seriously and I fully intend to take very good care of those plants.
This raises an important question however. Before The Mad Russian returns, should I replace them with plastic plants? Or with cacti?
Mischief Managed!
I drove down to Virginia this morning to help Mom and Dad load some furniture into their van. Before Dad and I put the first piece of furniture into the van, Mom unloaded the overnight bag and other small items they’d brought down in order to give the furniture as much room as possible.
Before we left my house, Dad noticed the squash on my counter and held one of them up and told Mom that I’d grown it in my garden. Mom immediately asked me what kind it was and I replied, “It’s round, white and from the next door neighbor.”
Dad grumbled, “You’re not going to let me get away with saying you grew it?”
“No. Because if I do, then I’ll be expected to know everything about it. And all I know is it’s round, white and came from my next door neighbor.”
While Mom was unloading the van, one of the items she took out was a white grocery bag that she didn’t recall seeing before. With a quizzical look, she opened the bag and then asked, “Oh, we get some squash too?”
And now Mom and Dad are are aware of “National Sneak Some Squash into your Parents’ Mini-Van Day.”